Self actualization and the break up that caused it!

It's Saturday and I'm sitting a hotel in Monterey CA...... I'm bored.  I do enjoy writing but trying to find the time just doesn't work too well sometimes.  I've got 2 subjects to discuss with myself tonight:

My girlfriend and I broke up 4 weeks ago.  Very mutual as there were things about me that wouldn't work into her life and vice versa.  While it was the right thing to do, I'm in the midst of that transition period where I got used to having someone to talk to and be with to being alone.  Let the self analyzing begin!

Balance is my flaw, or rather maintaining it is.  Trying to find that happy medium of self, family and relationships is where I struggle.  I am great with the relationship in the beginning at the expense of the others and then I find that I overcompensate on the others when I notice thus letting the relationship struggle.  I wish I was one of the great Welendas!

I also have an issue with the follow through.  I'm all in for a relationship but often find that I can't make it to the moving in part.  I'm debating internally if it's because I'm with the wrong person and I sub-consciously know it or if I'm just scared to open up myself up THAT much trying to keep the heart protected caused by past.......bitches, relationships.  I think it's a little of both.  The most current now ex-girlfriend, I think was a combination of both.  I think there were some things about her that I knew we wouldn't be able to overcome and I chose to ignore them and also that there were some things about her in some of her stories that led me to be wary of progressing to the point that I could completely open up to her. 

On an interesting note that I found out today, Happy Endings are not an urban myth!  I chose not to partake but it was offered and I must admit that I really considered it.  I know I'm getting old because as I was leaving, I was happier that my neck was feeling better afterwards than being offered the extra service.

I put Tinder on my phone tonight.  Thought I'd give it a try, not to hook up but with all the traveling that I'm doing, I'd like to get some insight and maybe some company for the local attractions.  Although, I can't rule out hooking up, I'll just consider that a perk should it happen.

Great times in Monterey!  I've been looking at taking my son on a trip sometime.  I've got enough points for flights and probably some hotels too.  He said he wants to go to LEGOLAND but I think I have him talked into Washington DC or maybe even New York.  I think that we'll have a great time going to either but I get a feeling that DC would be the better choice....... as the Smithsonian is there and he's all about the airplanes and spaceships....... go figure.

Speaking of trips, I think I'm going to take a day next week and go to Vancouver since I'll be in Washington state about 50 miles from there.  It would be a shame to miss an opportunity like that.  Now all I need to figure out is if I need to convert my currency or if they take American Dinero?

And that's all I've got for the moment.  Pretty boring stuff.  It's hard trying to be narcissistic!